Here.. we embark on another journey of mutual benefits.. learn more about me! And then I can get to notice things about myself too.

My name is: Jamie Jem Goh. MIddle names are original, unique, one-of-a-kind.. and tt's only my middle name but I shall spare you my second names in case some people choke on the realisation of what a wonderful friend they have. whaha
[In the morning I am]: Still sleeping.
[All I need is]: My family.. my friends..my buddies.. my love.. basically everyone in my life now.
[Love is]: Something that everyone should give and learn from, from the purest goodness in your heart that is innate in everyone.
I'm afraid of]: Death to loved ones and myself.. have not done a lot of things.
[I dream about]: oh. I dont really know actually..

-H A V E .Y O U. E V E R . .-
[Pictured your crush naked?]: haha No. I dont think I go that far.
[Actually seen your crush naked]: Damn no such luck. whaha kidding. I dont have a crush on anyone right now.
[Had sex]: Er.. if you're referring to conventional sex, no.
[Made love]: yes. I think even kissing is making love, cause you do it with feelings.
[Been in love]: I am in love
[Cried when someone died]: yes.. of course. Tear not cry though.
[Lied]: uh.. white lies. I try not to tell direct and profound lies.

-W H I C H . I S . B E T T E R-
[Coke or Pepsi]: Coke coke coke! *cheers* I should be a coke ambassodor.
[Flowers or candy]: erm.. none. how about chocolate
[Tall or short]: hmm.. both have their pros and cons.wish I was taller though.

-W I T H .T H E. O P P O S I T E. S E X-
[What do you notice first?]: the way the person carries himself/herself. it's very important, necause from little actions you can tell briefly tell how a person's character and attitude is like.
[Last person u slow danced with]: Hmmm.

-W H O-
[Makes you laugh the most?]: Hmm.. myself. I do! My jokes amuse me.. even if everyone else thinks they are lame. but face it guys! you love my jokes right?? haha
[Makes you smile]: The little things that people do for me.
[Do you have a crush on someone?]: Nopperz.
[Has a crush on you?]: Nah.. not charming enough. :(
[Easiest to talk to]: Hmm.. friends.. Cheryl..kossy.. Jo..


-D O. Y O U. E V E R-
[Sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special?]: Last time maybe but not anymore.
[Save Aol/aim conversations]: yes all stored in my memory bank.
[Wish you were a member of the opposite sex]: yes but only cause it makes things so much easier some times. but I always felt that if I were a guy I'd be a jerk so oh well. Everything happens for a good reason. I am glad I am a girl.
[Cried because of someone saying something to you]: Tear. Nor cry. I dont cry anymore. * wails* ahah

-H A V E .Y O U .E V E R-
[Fallen for your best friend]: No but they fell for me. Louey and Yun dont deny it man! haha kidding!
[Been rejected]: ha sadly yes.
[Rejected someone]: er... Yes.
[Used someone]: No, something that I would never do. Just not in my principles. If I ever did something lk tt it's unintentional.
[Been cheated on]: Not that I know of.
[cheated on?] Not that they know of. ha. But I am faithful NOW. *nods head*
[Done something you regret]: yes.. but not to the point where I let it get me down.

-W H O .W A S .T H E .L A S T. P E R S O N-
[You talked to on the phone]: Cheryl.. she's sick poor thing.
[Hugged]: Cheryl..
[You instant messaged]: Cheryl
[You laughed with]: Cheryl.. hahaha

-D O .Y O U-
[Colour your hair]: yes.
[Ever get off the damn computer]: of course! eyes hurt. Hey you know there's some new eye drop out there now specially for eyes that work too long on the com?
[Habla espanol]: um.. does that mean speak espanol? nahz.. oh! my former maid msged me from indonesia! how sweet! she left us for like.. few years already!

-D O .Y O U / / A R E .Y O U-
[Smoke cigarettes]: No.
[Obsessive]: uh.. not that I know of. I dont think so. I TRY to be reasonable. hah
[Could you live without the computer?]: hmm.. no. cause phone bills are ex and then how would I get to communicate with my precious yun then?
[How many peeps are on your buddy list?]:[ oh.. many many!
What's your favourite food?]: Chee Kuey :)
[What's your favourite fruit?]: Mandarin Pear and Mango
[Drink alcohol?]: Yes
[What hurts the most?]: I guess when loved ones say harsh words. or when you feel they dont love you anymore.
[Trust others way too easily?]: yes. Because I always felt that people are basically good, and will not maliciously harm people. most people anyway.

Dreams always last the longest when they are furthest from our reach... but hold on to life, even when it seems to be easier to let go...

For the gift of life is more precious than any other worldly materialistic things as well as non materialistic issues.

We all have images of our ideals, paintings of how we envision our life to be or the life we feel we deserve, but then a lonely frustration sets in when we do not reach that peak and that hope we once experienced becomes ephemeral all over again. That trudging uphill climb to the summit is becoming yet another one of our fantasies.

But where do we go from here?

I just feel that maybe we just need to do an inventory on our life and re-set our priorities. Maybe we were too hard on ourselves before, setting goals that are too far-fetched and resulting in setting to destroy self esteem. Maybe we should revalue our life and think about what's important, taking special note of those that do not come with a price tag. And maybe we should just take that first step towards self reflection, and emerge with better perspectives, and clearer ultimatum. There's always hope.

Jem's Update
It's been a while since I've updated.. my computer is still screwing up.. *sigh* And I need to look for a computer genius to help me out. Any recommendations anyone?

Life has been alright, looking up in many things, yet also down in some other things. But generally, everything is a-ok.

Girlfriends...
Sue: Hey! you mentioned clubbing! okok let's. Ha...
Gwen: you're in the middle of exams now arent you? Study hard! Glad your paper went ok.. the one which you were so worried for and hoping you'll get a 70.
Louey: Yo! Hmm.. not much to say to you since we're prob meetg at J8 sometime soon.
maumau: Hello! our trip how??? Haha. I am going to Tioman with my parents.. you guys are still welcome to join us.
Dele:hey so what's up with that woman whom you had dealings with online? Haha ok that sounded a little shady. But yeah! How's it man? Update me I wanna know what happened.
Crys:Neville coming home soon right? Lucky you.. hope everything is ok. Call me if anything k?
Yun: Hey sweetie! Miss you man.. how's things in ozzie land.. and w ur sis and all.

Other important people...
Zen: hey..starting school soon right? go stationery shopping.. I always think tt's the fun part about starting school ha.
Joey and Ah zi: @#$%^& sigh. I want my exams to be over too! Hhaa hope it went well. Enjoy the hols! How's Drey and you? And Vin and you?
Pz Kos and Lenny: Hey! ok you 3 are the only Bballers I know who come to my blog(besides Joey) But yeah! meet up soon.. play some ball. btw Len and Joey next Fri prob going back to CJ to play w the juniors.
Raine: heya! how's tt stressful project? hang in there k? ill think of more jokes for u. haha
Deb: hey never got round to asking you how's your uni and stuff.. too bad we didnt get to catch up much when u last came back. hope rome and u are doing great.:)
Val aka dj to be: how was ur audition??
WJ: hey fireman! how are things?

To all others whom I might have left out UNINTENTIONALLY
hope everyone is doing fine.. kp ur chins up! And be happy always.

I am very very tired.

This weekend approached, and a gut feeling told me that the end of Sunday would mean the prologue of a new chapter. Why should this particular week be different from others? *shrug* Maybe it's cause I took the past few days off to lose myself in the dizzy mixture of joy and fun, knowing that it all ends this coming week. So the feeling is changed. Studying now takes my top priority. Oh well.


Love me for me..
Sometimes I dont understand why people care so much about other people, and I dont mean in a concern way. I mean this in the manner where they scutinize and analyze, and ultimately find fault. Why cant they just let it be? Why must they focus on those faults and neglect to see that maybe that's what the person is comfortable with. Even if you have an authority over her, cant eyes be closed to certain things.

What's wrong with me.....

I cant believe you said that to me.

You have never known and will never ever know that sometimes I ask that question too.

But I like the way I am. I dont really give much of a damn about other people. But I've always tried to consider what you thought, how you felt. And I do all I can. But you're trying to control and change me, until I start living a double life, and all this hiding and worrying, I dont understand why it has to be this way.

I love Me. And I know you do too. But maybe you cant accept why I do the things I do. And maybe it's too much to seek your understanding, or even tolerance.

But I cant do much anymore. Whatever I can, I already tried, and am still trying. Dont drive me away anymore.

How can someone who's supposed to be so close feel so far away...

You're supposed to be the closest person at home. But closeness now simply becomes a measurement, a proximity. Cause you dont really know who I am. And you never gave me the chance to show you.

But who can blame you?I definitely dont. This isnt about pointing fingers and who should take responsibility. And who can blame anyone? If I am like that, a reaction like that is expected too. It's just the way things are.

Maybe I'm at fault too. Cause I'm not very typical. I'm not conventional. Socially that is.

I'm sorry.

But I really dont know what is wrong with me.

Scenario: The suave and charming Jem takes her stunning and cool black guitar, ( though definitely not surpassing Jem's standards), clears her throat *ahem ahem* and prepares to sing while her adoring fans wait with bated breath, shivering with an altitude of anticipation that puts the tallest buildings to shame. When those melodious words and harmony blend perfectly into the setting, a swooning breath can be heard, and some even collapse from the sheer trembling and nervousness. Security tightens for fear that oh-so-cool Jem may possibly get mobbed up over excited raging hormones fans. No wait, make that probably.

Haha. Ok... yes yes enough of my fantasy and enough of those sceptical rolling eyes.

I am going to sing a song though. A happy birthday song for my darling Cheryl!!

Happy birthday to you.. happy birthday to you.. happy birthday to cheryl cheryl cheryl... happy birthday to you!!
:)
hey darling, happy 20th birthday, haha time to grow up! nah but always have that child streak in you k? hope you like the present.. actually I think it looks kinda cool on you... haha ok everyone must be wondering what I bought.. ok here's a hint.. it's something that she can put on.. .. ok let your imagination go wild.

Anyway, I love you. looking forward to your birthday treat on Thursday. Let's go have a rollllling good time. :)

Last night, I was standing in a carpark, and looked up for no apparent reason. And then I learnt how the term star-gazing came about. You never want to tear your eyes away, and the camera inside of you automatically takes the best picture ever. Best of all, it remains in your memory.

It was a simple act, just looking up at nature. Yet when you stand there marvelling at that little simple act, you wonder when was the last time you took a moment to enjoy little miracles such as these.

It is time to open our eyes.

Mustard seeds are one of the tiniest seeds, yet they grow into one of the biggest trees of all. Maybe we should start believing in our own little actions.

Self lecturing, a little rebuking, but finally an admittance, I shall do what I have to do.

1) it is not too late to start studying, although it will be soon. Certain sacrifices have to be made. Keep to the timetable, do not let your concern rest within what you do not know, but what you shall learn.

2) Keep within budget. Plan finances, cut down on taxis. Save! Cut down on handphone usage too.

3) Build your relationship with God, and pray constantly for those who need it.

Ok I feel a little more settled, at least I have some sort of direction right now.

Last night, my girlfriend said to me "You're a pervert"
I replied " Wow that's a pretty big word for a 9 year old girl to use"

"Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend's house during a power failure."

"I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own."

"My wife is a sex object. Evertime I ask for sex, she objects."

Haha ok! A little something to share with you! Just thought they were pretty amusing. Couldnt stop laughing when I read them. So how many out there are shrieking with laughter how? Hurhur. ;D

To loose and learn, is better to loose and regret...
Ever look back and think about your 'what ifs?' Ever replay or reminisce moments which you know you may never relieve again? Ever felt afraid to make a choice then because you may be jerked out of a comfortable stupor?But I guess all this just serves to remind you to seize opprtunities, so that you'll me more readily prepared to deal with it if you ever get the chance to face it again.

Happy Easter everyone....
Let's not forget God's gift to us and take some time to realise His sacrifices for us, and try to do good in the ways we can.

You know how sometimes you get the feeling that maybe you're making a mistake, that the path you choose might not be the right one for you. So do you still take that risk? What if either way you choose, you lose. But then, you gain too.
Many things we do all boils down to our choices, and sometimes we make bad choices. But in that making of a bad choice, we had minimal or zilch inkling that it would turn out the way it did. And perhaps at that moment, you get blinded by your situation or circumstances that you lose your sense of foresight and shrug off the possible or probable consequences.

So what do you do then? Well, you dont have much of a choice. Either bounce back, or sink.

And perhaps ultimately love does win.
I guess. Oh well.

Jem's Update

Friday: Yay! met up with my girlfriends and had a fantastic time with them. Went to Changi village that night and Mau was so cute, trying to pass off as a guy so she could attempt to make conversation with some of the transvetites. Haha. And sticking our heads out from the sun roof along the expressway before we realised it was illegal. But yeah I miss you all loads let's meet up soon again. Went to Changi beach after that, telling lame jokes.. haha stoning.. didnt get home till like 5 plus.. and had to get up at 8 on
Saturday: cause my grandparents and auntie and uncle came! so you know..had to do some entertaining. Anyway would rather not elaborate my afternoon. Caught a midnight show 'The prince and me' .. It was.. alright. I mean, it was typical, not really very realistic.. but it was alright.
Today: Hmm meeting an old friend later... Gonna watch 'taking lives'! Yay angelina jolie.. hurhur.

ok this is pretty much my weekend. Sigh.

Recipe for Miracles


* Ingredients:
1 part of knowing who you are
1 part of knowing who you aren't
1 part of knowing what you want
1 part of knowing who you wish to be
1 part of knowing what you already have
1 part of choosing wisely from what you have
1 part of loving and thanking for ALL you have
* Instructions:
Combine ingredients together gently
and carefully,
using faith and vision.
Mix together with strong belief
of the outcome until finely blended.
Use thoughts, words and actions
for best results.
Bake until Blessed.
Give thanks again.
Yield: Unlimited servings

Anyway, here's review for Passion of Christ, seeing that today is Good Friday.. very appropriate.

The show in its broad context projects Jesus in the time before and during his journey on his road to cruxifiction. There were many flashes of Satan and his subtle yet disparaging constant put downs, the flashing of temptation that we are all so familiar with. Mel Gibson's rememberance of the presence of Satan was important because it reminds us that Jesus was also human, prone to experience frequent discouragement, yet his unwavering faith and unyielding courage ( not to mention high tolerance to pain) is simply just admirable.

Ok, now for the torture. His walk to Calvary wouldnt have been that sinous if it wasnt for the beating given earlier. And mind you, beating is a horrible understatement. It casted the black side -make that charcoal black- of mankind, alcohol serving as a gross catalyst for the savage animal in Man to emerge. Whipping him metal chain balls and clubs, both metal and heavily spiked, it stucked into his skin, and when pulled out, the skin went along with it. Ouch!Let's not forget Man's basic brute strength. It was a bloody sight. And it didnt go on for minutes, it went on for lifetimes. it went on for many tears, many cries, and sadly, much laughter. Ok.. I sound as though I have so much hatred, but it really was very sad. But as he preached, ' Love your enemies.'

On his journey, he had to carry this HUGE wooden dreadfully, eminently, notably, grossly, damned, staving ( ok you get the picture) heavy cross, the weight just simply bearing and jamming down on his raw cuts. Oh oh wait. I forgot one detail. Those drunken soldiers, (actually I just use the word drunken to disillusion me to the fact that people can be so surpassingly cruel), anyway, they made him a crown made of thorns and they slammed it on his head, making sure the thorns went right through into his skin. ouch! I mean, most of us shriek and shrill when a tiny thorn gets into our fingers. Imagine wicked and dirty and bacteria filled thorns in your head. It just gives me a headache thinking about it. hur. No pun intended. ok anyway yes, back to his journey, he was spat on, ridiculed, mocked, save for a few who mercifully saved my judgement on Man during that era (although who am I to judge).

When they nailed him to the cross, while dislocating his shoulder in the prcocess, a part of my heart got nailed and dislocated too. hurhur. And when they nailed his ankles, my legs gave way too. (Ok so yes I was sitting down but that's not the point.) But guys, use your imagination, and envision the type of pain caused by nailing rusty nails into your bone right through into a piece of wood. And bearing that pain for hours.

Throughout it all, Jesus still called for the Lord to have mercy on those who were ignorant.

And this ordeal? All for us.

There were several analysis about dreams involving teeth falling out. Debs and Mau here you are!

1.Dreaming that you have rotten or decaying teeth, forewarns that your health and/or business is in jeopardy. You may have uttered some false or foul words and those words are coming back to haunt you.
Yup... maybe that's why I'm sick now huh.

2.Look and see if you are losing or abusing power and control in any area of your life (especially if you are losing teeth in your dream). Old dream interpretations say that dreaming about teeth is a bad omen that suggest financial difficulties. Yes... I need $$$.

3.It can show the beginning of a new phase of life.You may be worried about your self image or the dream may signify unexpressed anxiety. Stress?? *shrugz*

Hmm seems like basically it isnt exactly a very good sign huh? But apparently dreams of teeth falling out are very common, and likely to occur frequently. And people who has these sort of dreams get so disturbed by the dream that they just simply have to know its significance, which explained Me. Ha. Oh well.

To Yun:

I know I havent been the greatest friend in the world these few weeks, it's hard to catch me on MSN and it seems like in a way I've completely disappeared from your life. but I just want to reaffirm and reassure you that I'm still around for you to call me anytime you like. I know you havent been going through a very easy time at this moment (read your blog) but I want you to know that you're still my bestest friend and nothing is going to change that. that. I'm sorry that i havent been around the picture much, been caught up with a lot of things currently, plus exams coming up... stress factor! But yeah, let's catch up soon k? I love you!

Lives can change with every breath we take.

Ever look back, and upon reflection find yourself hit with the phrase 'what if', and even though in a certain way or so you made the choice to take another path, you cant help wonder what the other side might be like. Or maybe just leaving it in the wonderment of our minds makes it even more bittersweet.

is it better to be a failure at something that you love, or be a success at something that you hate? Since life is short, the former huh? But as we all know, nothing is ever that easy.
But hey, nobody is a ever a failure. Failure is an event, not a person.

Sometimes I worry about the future, then I chide myself for worrying about something that hasnt happened. Sometimes I think about the past, and then I rebuke myself for thinking about something that has already happened.

I've been dreaming about teeth falling out lately. It kinda disturbed me so much, I checked it out on the Dream dictionary. but cant say it offered much insight, only perhaps disturbed me even more.

But what the hell man. Enjoy life.

Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars.
Henry Van Dyke

That's right.
I'm glad I'm alive, and healthy, and given more opportunities than what others might have. I've got many things to do.. and I'm gonna do them.

Why worry about tomorrow and spoil today, when joy today will bring forth a better memory for tomorrow.

Jem's Update

Things are looking up! yay... in many aspects of life.. I feel a little more organised about my school work.. and now that the night classes are over, I can balance my time more properly now. :)

Gonna watch Passion of Christ with my mummy later...

Gonna go for the MPH warehouse sale tomorrow at the Expo..

Gonna have dinner with the girls next week! Hey you all free on Tues? Does Tues sound good? BUt not somewhere ex please.. broke! We have to discuss our trip!

Joke Time! It might seem a bit long bit I absolutely insist that you all read this cause it cracked me up!

Man Who Loved Baked Beans


Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion
for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an
embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met
a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would
marry, he thought to himself, she'll never go through with the
marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme
sacrifice and gave up beans.

Shortly after that they were married. A few months later, on his
birthday and on the way home from work, his car broke down.
Since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her
that he would be late because he had to walk home. On his way
home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked
beans overwhelmed him. Since he still had several miles to walk
he figured he could walk off any ill affects before he got home.
It was, after all, his birthday. So he went in and ordered, and
before leaving had 3 extra large helpings of baked beans.

All the way home he putt-putted. By the time he arrived home he
felt reasonably safe. His wife met him at the door and seemed
somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most
wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She put a
blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the
table and made him promise not to peak. At this point he was
beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his wife was
about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again
made him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she
went to answer the phone. While she was gone, he seized the
opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was
not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time
breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about
him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came
on. He raised his leg and RRIIPPP !!! It sounded like a diesel
engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he
tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would
dissipate. He got another urge. This was a real blue ribbon
winner, the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a
minute later the flowers on the table were dead.

With his blindfold still on, when he heard the phone farewells
he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top
of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when
his wife walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if
he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not
peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "SURPRISE!!!"

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated
around the table for his surprise birthday party.

Hahaha... *grinz* It's funny right! Haha

: D

Cant we try just a litle bit harder..
Cant we give just a little bit more..
Cant we try to understand.. that it's love we're fighting for..

Sometimes, it all seems so wrong. You feel so undermined in the situation, you become frustrated when you have difficulty putting through what you try to express, you start feeling unappreciated. And then all of this starts pushing you away.

But other times, it all seems so right. The happiness, the laughter, the talking things out, the clearing of misunderstandings. And because you love so much, sometimes it doesnt seem to matter that you feel whatever you feel in the paragraph above.

Everyone needs someone they can talk to,
girl, that someone should be me...

Sometimes you feel the other holds back, and you dont know how to get her to love you the way she loved before.

And then, maybe it's all just youself. you demand too much, you expect too much, you blow things up. Maybe it's all your fault. ie. my fault.

And I'm sorry.

Dont let our love fade away....

I still want to try. You're still worth it. When you cried, it really broke my heart...

I love you.

Jo: Hey buddy.. I think we should have more talks by the riverside! hope you feel better yeah? Let's make that OUR place!~ Hee. Anyway.. hey... really thank you for yesterday.. I dont know how to convey my gratitude.. and just saying thank you doesnt seem enough! But thanks for being there.. wouldnt know what I would have done! Probably might have felt more lost! :) Anyway, yeah.. thanks... haha ok.. yeah... *blush blush* BIG HUG!