I am very very tired.

This weekend approached, and a gut feeling told me that the end of Sunday would mean the prologue of a new chapter. Why should this particular week be different from others? *shrug* Maybe it's cause I took the past few days off to lose myself in the dizzy mixture of joy and fun, knowing that it all ends this coming week. So the feeling is changed. Studying now takes my top priority. Oh well.


Love me for me..
Sometimes I dont understand why people care so much about other people, and I dont mean in a concern way. I mean this in the manner where they scutinize and analyze, and ultimately find fault. Why cant they just let it be? Why must they focus on those faults and neglect to see that maybe that's what the person is comfortable with. Even if you have an authority over her, cant eyes be closed to certain things.

What's wrong with me.....

I cant believe you said that to me.

You have never known and will never ever know that sometimes I ask that question too.

But I like the way I am. I dont really give much of a damn about other people. But I've always tried to consider what you thought, how you felt. And I do all I can. But you're trying to control and change me, until I start living a double life, and all this hiding and worrying, I dont understand why it has to be this way.

I love Me. And I know you do too. But maybe you cant accept why I do the things I do. And maybe it's too much to seek your understanding, or even tolerance.

But I cant do much anymore. Whatever I can, I already tried, and am still trying. Dont drive me away anymore.

How can someone who's supposed to be so close feel so far away...

You're supposed to be the closest person at home. But closeness now simply becomes a measurement, a proximity. Cause you dont really know who I am. And you never gave me the chance to show you.

But who can blame you?I definitely dont. This isnt about pointing fingers and who should take responsibility. And who can blame anyone? If I am like that, a reaction like that is expected too. It's just the way things are.

Maybe I'm at fault too. Cause I'm not very typical. I'm not conventional. Socially that is.

I'm sorry.

But I really dont know what is wrong with me.