" ... tell me about their life's most emotional moments -- the ups and downs. .. this means what has made you laugh, what has made you cry, and what has made you feel angry.
... the purpose for doing this, is that when you tell me your life story, you reveal yourself -- at leaast that's what usually happens, that's what's supposed to happen.
..i regret that in your case, you've been a very faithful story teller-- and a very thorough one... yet i feel that i dont know you. i know what's happened to you..
but you havent revealed yourself. i still dont know who you are."

john irving - 'until i find you'

the best authors write words which seem to speak directly to you. maybe that's why reading is such an addiction, because of our relation with the characters.

john irving also said ( or rather one of his characters) that the most damaging relationships are the ones which only existed as possible relationships.

dont you just love it when you read paragraphs and you nod your head in unison with the sentences?

go read that book guys. ive been carrying it everywhere and reading what i can at everywhere opportunity.
:)

so life updates? well, let's say it has been better.
but i always was a firm believer that with every down, you can only go up.

sometimes things dont go right, sometimes there are things that you can only look from a distance. sometimes the things you want the most is right in front of you, and you can hold it, but it is never really yours. because the things we hanker after is always elusive, it illuminates so near yet so far.

but contentment is the key. and one day, it always does get better. you have your failures, but also your successes. you have your downtracks, but you have your improvements too.

all about focus huh.?

oh well.

stomach has not been feeling too good lately. gastric.... :( i guess? i aint no doc!
been at k's place for the last 2 days and spend a ridiculous 45 bucks on grocery shopping. we just walked the isles and whatever caught our eye went into the basket, and we didnt realise the basket got heavier and heavier. haha

anyway, she cooked black pepper chicken and french fries! yummy.!
and in return, for supper, i cooked *proud pause* maggie mee!!

and it was just as delicious.

(thank you ah dar )

anyway, i love the nike bag that just came out. the white plastic looking (ok it is plastic) with the black tick.
there are 2 sizes i think. i want the smaller of the two.

it is very nice.

and you know, i know k didnt allow me to buy because she is going to give me a surprise and buy it for me!

ok it's all out on my blog.
how's that for pressure?
:)

the rainy season has begun, and doesnt look to be wearing off anytime soon.
only traces of sunrays peeking through.

i can fully relate to that

.isnt it better to take a step backwards at times? just to view things from a different angle, and perhaps a larger perspective? the irony of life is that when you are directly involved you become blind to what you should be seeing but cant.

taking a step back, isnt akin to turning around and walking away.

sometimes, there isnt any such thing as compromise. maybe it's because our wiring differences are too extreme. and no matter what your opinion is, there will always be a conflicting view, simply because of the way you are made.
that's when it becomes a lonely road to trudge.
but it doesnt anybody right or wrong, or any way of argument superior to the other.

the question is, despite it all, are you still able to accept that, and stay?
i would.
will you.?

"it was fascination, i know
and it might have ended at the start
a passing glance, a brief romance
and i might have gone on my way empty-hearted
fascination, oh and I know, I know babe
seeing you under, under the moonlight above
baby I, I touch ur hand
and I kiss you baby,
oh girl
and my, my fascination, my fascination
turned to love"
kem-fascination.

nice song.
think the lyrics speak of the road travelled by many.
a road common, typical, but nonetheless, always unique.

in my previous entry, i said life is interesting.
make that fascinating too. :)

selamat hari raya.

if the theory of alternative universes reign true, i wonder what our alter egos situations are like. more interestingly, is this wonderment a signal of discontented lives, or is it merely an innocent fantasy? after all, the art of day dreaming was perfected long before we reached adolescence.

the galaxy spreads far and wide, it's hard to fathom that we truly are sleeping underneath the same blue blanket, we share the same source of light, maybe even pointing at the same star, gazing at the same rainbow..

life/lives.
interesting.

draw your inspirations from your romantic fantasies, spurn out poetic metres and go dewey eyed with your versions of romeo and juliet.

sometimes, there is magic in the air.

when the magician waves its wands, suddenly a your knight in shining armour will just appear.
but just as quickly, it vanishes as well, leaving you either choking in its dust, or giddy with its appearance.

but knights live in legends, and legends last forever.

so step down to starbucks, grab your frap, indulge in a little cadbury, and await for that magic.

ladies, oh ladies, and gentlemen, sometimes, being romantic, is okay.
soak in the valentines' day spirit, and go get your partner a rose.

announcement

first my desktop, now my laptop. arg! just like me, my laptop has contracted a virus.
hence, till i launch operation virus annihiliation total demolition, im only gonna be a fleeting figure in the cyber world.

the only time i will be online is when i stay over at k's house.

:)

-----------
let's have some randoms.

1. pretty hectic at work with increased quotas and pressing deadlines. plus staring at a computer screen every day is seriously giving me migraines.
i officially go insane everyday at 6pm when my battery runs out.

2. look at the rabbit at the top of my tag! k did it for me. i think it does remind me of duey. SO CUTE RIGHT.

3. im going to bangkok on the 18th nov! yay!

4. oh yes.

negotiated with the school to allow for early termination of contract, and i wont be teaching piano from the end of october! (save for private piano)
the relief that i felt when i received the phone call..
i reached the end of this line a few months back. sometimes, you just know when it is time.
will i miss it? never.
will i miss my students? no.

well, yes actually a few. i will definitely think back back wonder how they are. im planning to keep in touch with them, so actually, i dont feel that much regret.

celebrate with me people.
this is liberty we are talking about.

life has been slightly messy, concerning future and where im heading and accomplishments and achievements etc.
i need to straighten them out and get back on track.

life is shit.
but life is good too.

what do bryan adams, rod stewart and jem goh have in common?
they all have hoarse voices.

*snigger* ok cut the crap about how i am not in the same league as them ( or they arent in the same league as me ) . okok! i know where i stand.

anyway, i am tired of being sick. the novelty, if there was any to begin with in the first place has long been worn off.

fluctuating temperatures, phlegm, mucus, name the works and i'll give it to you.

i'd like to say a warm thank you to k who stayed up one of the nights to sponge me down and feed me my medicine etc. and in the process fell sick herself. oops. :X

in the disorientation caused by my illness, i lost track of my dates. and forgot that yesterday was the 12th!

which means it's k and i 's tenth month anni.

wow.

i loved you these 10 months. and will love you even more!
happy number 10 dar..

oh yes, go listen to unintended by muse.

i love love love the song.

sweet melancholy.

my voice is incredibly sexy and husky now.
*hey baby*
haha swooning aside, here's the belated post about my birthday celebration at hard rock!
ps: i have so far kept to my promise about alcohol abstinence.












jem the birthday girl!

these are the preview pictures. due to space constraints, most unfortunately all the pictures cannot be put up. please go to joanne's blog and view the full pics. i will put up the link soon too.

anyway, a huge thank you to:

1.mummy and uncle oliver. who kindly came down to cut the cake. they were only supposed to stay for that but they ended up staying till late!! haha but it was nice:) thank you to those who took the initiative to go outside to smoke and refrained from displays of overtly affections.

2. kellyn. for arranging the cake and for that very lovely and sparkling diamond ring. haha :) i love you...

3. LOUEY!!!!!!! i think all the overwhelming gratitude i felt i showed it that night. haha i was reallly very very touched.

to deb.jw, and daph too who accompanied her and came down. and yes to daph who bluffed me that you guys were not coming.. haha but it was a great surprise. thank you.

4. speaking of surprises, pooja harnie and perf. for that 'surprise' too. haha i hoped i acted well.

5. gwennie poo and sureeeeeeen!!!!!!!! what would a party be without youuuu

6. jo, aud and jodie!jo thanks for all the pics!!! '

7. jan, lion, and michelle aka mu gua, ah gua, and sa gua.. sorry lion!!! haha (michelle thank you for your present. lovely gesture! )

8. michele chan!!! im sorry !! u know what for!! im sorry!! 2nd time i know!!

9. jasmine my princess looking lovely in dots. haha

10. joey nam!! zen and bessy!! PLUS your presents and the very very yummylicious dinner

11. cheryl. :)

12. veron and wendy. !

13. JOAN AND IVY! not to forget val and candice too.

anyway, i sincerely hope i did not forget anyone. and no this is NOT in order of importance and your name aint here it doesnt mean you are nobody it just means i am absent minded! anyway, if you were present, you would have witnessed the amount of alcohol consumed and how heavily a price i paid.

haha

but from the very bottom of my heart, i would really want to extend heartfelt thanks.

i felt so loved that night!! haha

THANK YOU

on an average day, jem occasionally has to struggle to take in air and has to resort to uncomfortable deep breathing because of chest tightenings.
:(

with a psi reading soaring to as high as 130, im just seriously down in the dumps.

i didnt feel the effects of the haze till yesterday, when k and i stepped into town. i thought my glasses were dirty. but even if i change new lenses, its still foggy!
it is that bad. exaggeration? please, this is the sad truth.

i returned from piano almost blue from the lack of oxygen (ok this IS stretching the truth a little) , coughing incessantly (again sad truth) and a volley of complains.

how ironic, considering i was rambling on and then i ended off with 'oh i am going out later'

haha i think my parents couldnt decide if that was amusing.

anyway, my mum insisted, (and i resisted) that my inhaler AND my nasal spray along with me.

i told her it wouldnt help.
so she said, 'ok tmr i buy you mask. '

mask it is.

hold me when we are happy.
draw me closer when we are not.

stay by my side when we are happy.
come closer to me when we are not.

translation: love me when times are good. and still love me, even when times are bad.

i love you.

i solemnly declare, and all who read shall be witness, that i, jem goh, is staying away from alcohol.

this is my public announcement and before you scoff at the authenticity of the statement, all who were present at hard rock last night for my birthday should pause to think about the amount of drinks, and the even more amount of puke, and give me the benefit of the doubt!!

;)
haha

i have amillion thank yous to say.
especially to those who made an appearance.

but i shall do that when my head doesnt hurt that much ok?

off to nurse the hangover.