the worst part of being in a nightmare isnt one which you cant wake up from, but one which you created yourself.
one careless move and you bear mountains of consequences.
you screw up once, and sometimes you pay for the rest of your life.

because at times, the things you lost arent the things you can afford to lose.
you destroyed all the important elements, and you cause your own downfall.

most heartbreakingly, you lose the one who you love with all your heart.

and every single minute, you wish fervently you can turn back, so that everything will be alright and you can see that smile once more.

i ruined everything. every single thing that mattered so much has been taken away from me. and i deserve it.

i am sorry.
to you, to me, to us.

yet, despite it all, you gave me another chance.

the words you said, the hugs and the kisses. that moment, will always be etched in my memory.
because it is now that i have caught a glimpse of life without you, and i saw that the road ahead was lonely and empty.
the relief, the pain, the happiness, the amazement... i swore in that moment i will never hurt you.

i lost everything. or rather, i carelessly threw it all away.
yet, you picked it up, and gave them back to me.

you didnt give up on me...