it's a fascinating process when you work out what you believe in.

people are usually afraid of what people think of them.
it's perhaps unusual to find someone who is afraid of self judgement, which is exactly which category i carelessly reside.

i just completed a book called 'im a believer' by jessica adams which turned out to be one of the most interesting novels i have picked up in a long time. (and to think i picked it up because i thought it was one of those dumb escapism but undeniable funny books. yes yes i lost the taste i acquired for 'healthy' books'.)

i dont know if the author's intention was to be one of serious thought provocation, but that's what it did for me, for its contents focused on the theme of believing.

or faith.

not strictly about religion though there were some jibes at chrisitianity which showed successfully how ignorant an average man can be yet how --dare i say this-- certain christians have their ideas a little warped.

anyway, briefly this story is about how a man lost his girlfriend to a car accident and how he starts seeing her ghost everywhere.

no i'm not encouraging any poltergiest activities. my faith only goes tt far. haha.

digress.

it's a good book for one with appalling cynism as it can be accurately identified with the main character.

and though i would say i believe in faith, it is really an eye and heart opener to reexamine what ive always believed all along and revive it from its stagnant position, hence my title for the entry.

more importantly, it reminded me how critical believing is. because when gloom looms up upon your world, what else do you have?

i always felt that faith is perhaps one of the hugest (is there such a word) factor in my life. how else would i have gotton through all these years?