Merry Christmas to all..
Let's us now take a pause in time to reflect upon the sacrifices He metted out to us so unselfishly. We should all take a leaf out of His book....

I just re-read my previous entry and felt as well as remembered the extent of bile I tasted due to that one simple phone call which lasted all but 5 minutes. It's funny how the slightest incident can trigger off such a flood of emotions and drown all the contentment and stoicness that I've been building up over the last few days. But now, all those feelings are just replaced by resignation, as well as knowledge that every road construction takes effort and time to built, and for the sake of myself, I should just let it be.

Just woke up with a slight throbbing headache,( not pig but tired ;p), last night turned out better than expected.. To you guys who were with me last night, thank you! And for fulfilling that craving of roti prata..at like hmmm 4 in the morning.. next round it's to Mount Faber for my sunrise haha.. and thank you candice for taking me home. The conveniences of car... arg.. give me a few months man.

ITS NOT YOU, IT'S ME.
To you: I am sorry for doing this to you, I guess after everything, you know how it turned me into, I was not exactly the greatest or sweetest gf, quite the contrary in fact. It is not fair for you to hold on when you deserve someone better. I am too immune to relationships, and you know how some things can bring up so many of the memories that I've been trying to kick away. As selfish as this sounds, right at this point in time, I really do not want to care about anything, and just lose myself in moments.
I do not want the commitment nor put in the effort needed in every relationship, I dont have it in me to try anymore. It's not your fault, so dont ever think it's you, because it isnt. So dont blame yourself.
I dont know what happened to me, why I became this heck care person, guess it had been building up for some time.Even writing this takes a lot. I'm sorry, that I'm like that. I just need time to think things through on my own and look for myself within myeslf. But I have to do this alone.
You can still call me or message me if you want, I still can be there to listen. Take care.