"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Martin Luther King Jr.
J. Lubbock once said this. "When we have done our best, we should wait the result in peace."
perhaps finding peace in the midst of disturbance is also courage.

Dear God,I am tired. The mental wars that have been battling arent going to terminate any time soon. I feel that I have exhausted much of my human capacity to struggle against the issues that I want, I overexerted my energies and strengthen my weaknesses, all with the staunch desire for stability and contentedness in my life. Yet, I realised that currently, and temporary, I am not in a position to be in full control. Yes, no one is ever in full control, but it seems like I do not even have half the authority. I'd like to think that I am steadfast and audacious, that I am able to direct myself through all the bleak situations. And I can. But I guess I need a bit of your help. Sometimes, this bravado can be a false front, a mask to blur all the misery that I go through sometimes. But I always tell myself, it's beyond the power of my will, so I should cease worrying, this is an experience that will grow my soul, and I know that amidst it all, there is always something beautiful out there.
Amen.


Anyway guys.. here's a little story. thought it was meaningful.

Cupcakes and Rootbeer
By Julie A. Manhan
There once was a little boy who wanted to meet God. He knew it was a long trip to where God lived, so he packed his suitcase with cupcakes, several cans of root beer and started on his journey.
When he had gone about three blocks, he saw an elderly woman. She was sitting on a park bench watching the pigeons. The boy sat down next to her and opened his suitcase. He was about to take a drink from his root beer when he noticed the lady looked hungry so he offered her a cupcake. She gratefully accepted and smiled at him.
Her smile was so wonderful that he wanted to see it again, so he offered a root beer as well. Once again she smiled at him. The boy was delighted!
They sat there all afternoon eating and smiling without saying a word.
As it began to grow dark, the boy realized how tired he was and wanted to go home. He got up to leave but before he had gone no more than a few steps, he turned around and ran back to the old woman, giving her a big hug. She gave him her biggest smile ever.When the boy arrived home his Mother was surprised by the look of joy on his face. She asked, "What has made you so happy today?" He replied, "I had lunch with God." Before his mother could respond he added, "You know what? She's got the most beautiful smile in the whole world!"
Meanwhile, the old woman, also radiant with joy, returned to her home. Her son was stunned by the look of peace on her face. He asked, "Mother, what has made you so happy today?" She replied, "I ate cupcakes in the park with God." And before her son could reply, she added, "You know, he is much younger than I expected."

moral: God exists in each of us.. and He is everywhere.

2 days... just 2 more days...