The days of deja vu are fast approaching, and I await them in anticipation of the relief and trepidation of repetitive hell all over again. Will the lingering taste of the past finally be swallowed or spat out? or will it continue to dawdle? Does everything really depend on me now? If I stand firm and hard can the long-awaited former finally occur? Or am I going to threatened or remain captured by the chains of hmm.. I dont know either. For the past few weeks, I think all the guilt or responsibilites that I felt, and took away much of my freedom, have since been disannuled by all the trying or giving in, and most of all, the incessant storms that brew up, and I dont care anymore. I dont want to care anymore.

I said this, said thatm but in the end, nothing changes.
I tried this, tried that, but in the end, nothing changes.
I did this, did that, but in the end, nothing changes.
Now, I am going to say this,try that, and do it, and in the end, maybe everything will change.

I do not deny that I am afraid, that I fear, and I am disquieted and apprehendsive about everything. Give me strength.

When I hurt, just hold me and I'll be ok...